My World of Hell, part six

Great, a hill giant.

Teela stayed behind me. As if that would protect her from a swing from this big boy."You've fought these before, yes?"

"Uh, sure," I said. "All the time."

The few soldiers in front of me stepped to the side and let the hill giant pass. He stepped forward. Each step made the floor moved. The soldiers grinned amongst themselves as the giant stopped in front of me. He breathed hard, hard enough to mess up my hair. And yet, his breath didn't stink. It looked as if he hadn't had a bath in months, but he didn't stink.

The giant brought his club high. I started to move back. Maybe from the narrow hall behind us I could take him, but here I was pretty much screwed.

Then he did the last thing I expected. He winked at me.

"Do I know you?" I asked rhetorically.

He spoke. His voice made Barry White sound like Britney Spears. What he said wasn't in common, but it was in a language I knew a little something about. I lowered my sword.

"Why does he know elvish?" Teela asked.

The giant turned slowly and faced the soldiers. "Uh oh," one of them muttered, and it was the last thing he said.

The hill giant crushed the man's skull. His kicked another soldier, sending the man into the wall. I heard the soldier's spine crack, and then he crashed to the floor.

Another soldier came up behind the giant and tried to slash at the ankle. I raced forward and blocked it with my own sword. I whipped my sword around, but I failed to disarm him. I dropped and swept him. His feet went over his head and he landed on his head. I heard a crunch when he hit. He probably wouldn't walk again. To be sure, I stuck him in the neck with my sword.

When I turned, the hill giant had the last soldier in hand. He rammed his head into the ceiling at full speed, and then dropped his broken body on the floor with the rest of the busted soldiers.

"Nice work," I said. "Can I assume you are not who you appear to be?"

The giant faced me. Teela's eyes, widened as the hill giant shrank until he was about five feet tall. My eyes widened when I saw that he was now a she.

"Indeed," she said. The hill giant was now an elf. Judging by the bright red hair she must have been a wood elf. She was kinda cute, too. Her mangy clothes had been replaced with simple woodsman's clothes (or woodswoman's, I suppose). Her club had become a staff.

"Neat trick," I said. "I'm John Carter. This is Teela."

"Greetings to you," she said. "I am Kella." She looked over my shoulder and down the hall that led to the ettin's lair. "I suggest we leave now before anyone wonders where these men have gone."

She gestured for us to follow her. She went straight to a section of wall where a map of the wild coast rested. She moved it aside and pushed against the wall. It opened as easily as any wooden door.

"Secret doors," I said. "I love these things."

Teela squeezed my hand and smiled at me. I didn't know that she was holding it until then. I felt good. For a moment I had forgotten that I had been tortured for God knows how long. I was this close to freedom, and there's no feeling like that.

Kella said nothing as we went down the hall. Now that I got a closer look at her, I could see that her ears were a little more rounded than most elves. That and her hips were fuller. She might have been a half elf, but I thought it impolite to ask.

The corridor turned a few times before we came to another door. It opened into another room that connected with the main hall that led out of here. From here, I actually knew where to go.

"Where is everyone?" I asked.

"Everyone was ordered to the surface," Kella said. "Something about needing more scouting parties. Many scouts have not returned. Hedrack believes someone is planning an invasion."

"Yeah?" I said. "I hope so." For a moment, I thought of telling them about Thrommel and his plans to return with reinforcements. It occurred to me that I didn't know these two and what their game was. I remember this Outer Limits episode where they fooled this soldier into revealing secret battle plans. I decided to keep my trap shut. All that really mattered now was getting out of here.

"Hedrack was angry about an escaped prisoner," Teela said. "Some prince."

"Prince Thrommel," Kella said. "Yes, I could not find him." She looked at me. "You freed him, didn't you?"

I nodded. "My friends and I did."

"I'm sorry about your friends," Kella said.

"What happened to them?" I asked.

"Hedrack sent them to the nodes," Teela said. "He bragged about it."

"The nodes?"

"They are imitations of the elemental planes," Kella said. "Hedrack has been summoning creatures from the elemental planes and placing them in the nodes. He is building an army, though for what purpose I do not know."

We reached the stairs that led to the next level. "Same reason as any army. Kill, pillage, acquire power--all that stuff."

"I do not think we can get by Hedrack's troops on the surface," Kella said.

"We're not going that way," I said. "Follow me."

I remembered the path as if it were yesterday. I managed to avoid any rooms that might have held monsters as we went to the secret passage that led away from the temple. It was basically a very narrow passage that opened up very close to the city of Nulb. I told them about it.

"I never knew of it," Kella said.

"Most didn't," I said. "For good reason. You don't just tell people about secret passages in and out of your stronghold. Anyway, once there you're on your own."

"What?" Teela said. "Where are you going?"

"Back," I said. "I'm going to these nodes."

"What?" Kella grasped my arm. "You cannot go there. There are terrible creatures there, and the nodes themselves can kill you."

"No choice," I said. "My friends are there. I have to get them."

"I doubt they are still alive," Kella said.

"You don't know them," I said. "I have to try. I'd hate myself if I didn't."

We reached the trap door that led to the secret chamber. It was where we fought a wizard and his half-orc companion. It was also where we found the Orb of Golden Death, aka the skull.

We rounded the corner and went down the passage. It was a few hundred feet to a room where the exit tunnel was.

"Kella, tell me everything you know about the nodes," I said.

"I know little," she said. "I only know that when you face the main alter, the passages to the left lead to the nodes. Those to the right lead to the elemental planes." She shivered. "If you go there, you are doomed."

"I'll have to be careful then."

"But you can't go," Teela said. "Hedrack said that when he put your friends there they would be trapped."

"There has to be a way out," I said. "Otherwise, how would Hedrack gather his armies?" I patted the portable hole in my pocket. "I think this golden skull may provide an answer to that."

"He was very happy to get it," Teela said. "I hope for your sake that is true."

We reached the end of the tunnel. The end of the tunnel was really a pivoting door made to look like the rest of the surrounding rock. I pushed on it and it opened easily.

"We're almost there," I said. I entered the natural cave. It seemed to be well lit for some reason. I watched Kella and Teela enter. They both looked around curiously.

"What a strange cave," Kella said. "Which way?"

I pointed to the other tunnel. "Follow this until--" I looked at the tunnel. It had a tile floor and formica walls. The ceiling was also covered in tile. Florescent lights lit the entire length of the hall.

"What the hell?" The "cave" was a tiled entry way to some large building. There was a desk where a security guard sat. Normally, he would greet visitors, but right now he stood in front of the desk. He had his hand on what looked like a night stick. Two large plate glass windows covered one wall. I could easily see the parking lot. There were only a few cars there. Stone steps led down to a sidewalk and a perfectly green lawn. Two police cars were parked on the lawn, their overheads blazed dazzling lights. Four police officers came up the stairs to the double glass doors. They had their hands on their weapons.

"What is wrong?" Kella asked.

"Oh God," I muttered. Teela and Kella were dressed in white hospital gowns. Their hair looked as if it hadn't been combed in days. They each had a dazed look in their eyes. They looked like they belonged in an asylum, and from the looks of it that's where we were.

"We are free, yes?" Teela asked.

I didn't know how to answer.

My World of Hell, part five

The young woman unlocked the shackles. They fell away and I stood. It felt good to stretch my back. The healing potions had removed all pain and discomfort. I felt like I had a full belly and awoken from a good night sleep. My clothes were torn and bloodied, but every other part of me was in the best of health.

"I took this," she said. She handed me a small piece of cloth folded over several times. "He seemed to think it was important."

I nodded. I set it on the floor and opened it. The round cloth stretched to about six feet in diameter. The magic went into affect instantly. The cloth became a hole, and in the hole was our gear. I dug through it. Everything was there. All of our gear, even the treasure we found. He kept it all in there. Well, almost everything.

"It's not here," I said.

"What?"

"The skull," I said, "and my journal. We have to find them."

"They may be in his quarters," she said. A look of horror crossed her face. "I can't go there. I can't--"

"What's you're name?"

She swallowed hard enough that I could hear it. "Teela."

"Teela," I said. "I won't let anyone hurt you. Understand? First order of business is to get you out of here. Then I have to find my friends." I pulled out my chain mail. "Here, help me."

I showed her what to do. Getting armor on by yourself is no easy task. You almost always need help. It was a bit loose on me. I wondered how much weight I had lost over...I had no idea how long I had been here. All I knew was that I was free and I wasn't going back. This was my only chance and I'd be a fool to not take it.

I pulled out my long sword. It felt light in my hand. Teela stepped back as I hefted it.

"How did you get away?" I asked.

"Something was happening on the upper levels," she said. "I don't know what, but it was enough to anger Hedrack. He left me and--"

"No," I said. "How did you escape his magic?"

"He has used his magic on me several times," she said. "It only lasts so long, and the length of time is different each time he uses it. I used to try to escape or to fight him when it wore off. This time I pretended it was still working."

"How long?" I asked, folding up the portable hole and putting it away.

"Four days now," she said. "I let him take me when he wished. I told him I loved him even as he beat me...." She looked on the verge of crying. "I would rather die than go back to him."

"You're not dying today," I said. "You're going to die when you're old and surrounded by great grandchildren." I went to the door. It was closed, but unlocked. "The rest of these guys, on the other hand...."

"There are too many," she said. "Even though many have gone with Hedrack, you can't take all of them on."

"We'll see."

I opened the door to my cell. It opened into a room full of crates and barrels. I realized the other side of the door looked like a stone wall. The small window in the door wasn't visible from the other side either. It must have been a magical illusion or something. Regardless, I didn't have time to think about it.

I took a quick look around. No one was present. "Where is everyone?"

"They went above," Teela said. "Something is going on up there."

"Hopefully it's Thrommel and his crew." There was one door in the room. "What's on the other side."

"Nothing right now," she said. "Normally there is an ettin present, but it went to the surface with the others."

"An ettin? What the hells is that?"

"A two-headed giant."

I opened the door a crack and peaked through. The room was huge and lit by torches, but it seemed empty. I opened it further and stepped into the room, my sword ready. A gigantic pile of rotting rags lay against one wall. It was likely the ettin's bed. I stepped further into the room. Teela stayed behind me.

"They didn't leave guards," I said.

"Hedrack assumed you wouldn't leave," Teela said. "He said he had broken you." She winced at my expression. "Looks like he was wrong."

I said nothing. She was relying on me to get her out of there alive. I didn't want to tell her that Hedrack had broken me.

"Which way to his quarters?"

She shook her head. "I can't--"

"You said he went to the surface, right?" She nodded. "So he's not here."

"Can we not just leave?"

"I have to get the golden skull," I said. "I can't leave it with Hedrack." I took her hand in mine. She clutched my hand tightly. "Teela, I'll get you out of here, I promise. But you have to show me his quarters before he gets back."

She stared at me for a moment before nodding grimly. "This way." Still clutching hand she led me across the room. We went down a hall leading out of the room. A short way down the hall was a door that stood open. This led to a hall that eventually opened into a large rectangular room.

I smiled. "Jack pot."

Maps covered the walls. One showed Hommlet, another showed Nulb. There were also maps of the surrounding wilderness and the Kron Hills. There was even one of Verbobonc. On the table rested several books. One of them was clearly recognizable.

"My journal," I said. I pulled out the portable hole and tossed it on to the floor. The dimensional pocket opened up immediately. I pulled maps off the wall and tossed them into the hole. I grabbed my journal as well as every other book on the table (there maybe a dozen or so).

"Are his quarters that way?" I asked, pointing at the one other door in the room.

"Yes," she said. She pushed it open. "We must hurry."

I grabbed the edge of the hole and lifted it. The hole became a circular cloth again. I folded it as I followed her through the door and down the hall to another door that was still open. Beyond was the most impressive bedroom I had seen.

Tapestries covered every wall, all with symbols of squares, triangles, circles, and eight pointed stars. Bookshelves lined one wall, with another wall containing two braziers that radiated heat. A bed rest against another wall and next to that a desk and a wardrobe. There was a wealth of beautiful furniture and jewelry resting on stands. I could have spent hours going through everything, but I didn't have that kind of time.

"If I were a golden skull," I said, "where would I be?"

"He always keeps the desk locked," Teela said. She went to a shelf and removed a book. She opened the book and reached into it. A compartment had been cut away from the pages. A key rested in the hidden compartment.

I took the key from her and opened the locked drawer. One drawer contained papers of various kinds. I laid out the portable hole and tossed the papers into it. Never can tell what may or may not be useful. The next drawer contained a pile of blank parchment. Underneath it, rested the skull. I grabbed it without thinking.

Thoughts flooded my mind. I saw images of debauchery and torture. I saw scenes of women being raped through the eyes of the rapists. The images stopped as suddenly as they began. I felt a curious sensation, as if I had just discovered something I didn't know a moment before. It took me a few seconds to realize that this realization was not my own.

You are not him. The skull's thoughts slid through my mind like an oil slick. I thought I would be sick.

"What is wrong?" Teela asked, but I barely heard her.

You are his toy, the skull said. At least, you were.

"I am my own man," I said.

"Of course you are," Teela said. "Can't we discuss this outside."

Indeed, the skull said. And with my help, he can be your slave.

Hedrack could be mine. I could do to him what he did to me, and far worse. The skull showed me what it could do. Ideas filled my mind of how to torture him, of what I could do to him. The skull showed me things I would never have--

Teela put her hand on my shoulder. "What is it?"

I snapped back into the real world. I tossed the skull into the portable hole and grabbed the edge. "Let's go."

I folded it as we left the room. If we could find the main hall I could get us up to the next level. I'd show her the way out through the secret passage. Then I'd return and find my friends. All of this assumed we wouldn't run into anyone along the way.

We entered the map room and continued on. Hedrack must have really had faith in me being broken, and with his mistress remaining loyal. As we left the map room and entered the larger room, I thought we might actually survive this ordeal.

That's when all my plans fell apart.

Five humans stood there. Under their black, temple robes they wore chainmail. They wielded the weapon of choice among NPCs everywhere--a long sword. Humans I can deal with. It was what was behind them that worried me.

It looked mostly like a human--a human that was over ten feet tall and looked like Quasi Modo's ugly brother. It stared at me, hefting a club thicker than most telephone poles and almost as long. Drool dribbled down its chin. This was, as I realized later, a hill giant. It had a face not even a mother could love.

One human stepped forward. "Going somewhere."

Just great.

My World of Hell, part four

I dreamed of a soft bed. I realized it was my bad back home. It had been so long, I wondered what happened to it?

The covers stirred, but it wasn't me. Someone was with me in bed. I felt I knew her, but....

I woke up. Someone touched my face. I didn't react. I was too tired, too hurt. Pain lanced every part of me. I didn't have the will anymore to help myself.

"Awaken," a voice said.

I looked up. A blurry shape hovered over me. It had to be Hedrack. I wanted to die right there.

"Please," the voice said again. "Awaken."

Only then did I realize it was a woman's voice. I tried to sit up, but my broken ribs wouldn't allow it. A hand reached under me and helped me. I started to cry out, but another hand covered my mouth gently.

"Here, drink."

I did what I was told. Even before the flask touched my lips I could smell the healing potion. I drank it deeply. When it was empty she handed me another, and then another. Five potions later the aches and pains were gone.

My adjusted finally and I could see her clearly. It was Hedrack's woman. She wore a large brown cloak. Underneath she wore her usual outfit that covered only the bare essentials. She must have grabbed it at the last moment. If Hedrack knew she were gone--

Or did he? Was he Hedrack. What did he call himself again? Doctor....

She produced a key from under her cloak. "Do you wish to be free?" she asked.

I stared at her, trying to see through the illusion of what was before me. I tried to see a tiled floor beneath us and formica walls around us. I tried to see her wearing something else--a nurse's uniform or a doctor's, or whatever. I tried to imagine myself as a lunatic at Fort Logan Mental Health Institute. I was delusional and I needed to wake up. I needed to become myself again. I needed--

"Tell me," she said, "do you believe what he told you."

I looked at her hand holding the key. It had become a syringe. She was trying to trick me. I tried to pull away but she caught me by my chin. Her grip was warm and firm.

"I believed him," she said. "Through magic, he made me believe. He convinced me I loved him, even as he raped and beat me. I know better now." She held up her hand. The syringe was a key again. "Do you still believe him?"

I reached for the key and felt it. It was made of simple iron. I pushed hard on both ends of it with my fingers. It didn't feel like a needle. She waited for me patiently.

"He is convincing," she said. "I know."

"Yeah, he had me going," I said. I held up my manacles. "But not anymore. Get me the hell out of here."

My World of Hell, part three

I stood in a forest grove. It was the same grove I appeared in when I first came to the Flanaess. Audry stood before me calmly as I removed her clothes. She did not resist. I was hungry for her. I struggled to remove them quickly, but they felt heavy. I could barely lift her jerkin.

Anna is right. You are slow.

She touched her clothing. They fell away immediately. She stood, nude, her arms reaching for me. I didn't resist as she pulled me to the ground and lay on top of me.

If only you weren't dreaming again.

She fell away from me. Someone plunged me into a river.

-----------------------

I awoke soaking wet. One of Hedrack's lackeys stood over me with an empty bucket that had been full of water at one time.

"Wakey, wakey," he said.

Hedrack waved the man away with a gesture. The man left the room. Behind Hedrack stood his woman again. She actually showed her disgust now, but I was beyond caring. The beating didn't begin again. He only watched me for a moment, a strange look on his face that I couldn't place.

Then he spoke two words. Those words terrified me.

"What do those words mean?" he asked. "They are of no language I know of, nor do my wizards have records of any words." He caught his breath. "Unless...."

He knelt over me again. "What is your name?"

"You know my name," I said.

"No, I only know what you call yourself," Hedrack said. "Is your name John Carter?"

I tried to resist, but I was beyond it. I was broken. I would have told him anything.

"No," I said.

"What is your real name?"

"You already know that too," I said.

He glanced back at his priest for confirmation. "As I suspected. By the way, have you figured out where you are?"

"Hell," I said, "though the specific layer escapes me."

He cracked a smile. "Perhaps. Now, tell me, Where are you?"

"Somewhere in the elemental temple, I would presume."

I felt a hand under my chin. I didn't resist. A glass flask pressed against my lips. The liquid felt like water to a man dying of thirst. No matter how many times you taste a healing potion, you never grow used to your taste. It must be how ambrosia tastes.

I looked up after I drained the potion. Above me stood Hedrack's woman, her hand under my chin. She released me and took the empty potion bottle. She passed Hedrack with her eyes lowered. She leaned against the wall near a torch where I could still see her. She turned and regarded me. She didn't seem indifferent, nor did she seem disgusted any longer. She looked more passive then I had seen her before.

"As I thought," Hedrack said. "Delusional and disassociative, as I suspected."

Part of me wanted to spit out a retort, but I was afraid. Looking at him, I realized I would do or believe whatever he said. I belonged to him now. I could not hurt anymore than a puppy dog could hurt its owner.

"Shall I show you where you are?"

I didn't resist as he reached for me. He touched my forehead with his hand and I felt myself slip into unconsciousness.

--------------------------------

I saw myself in a white room. I looked down on myself from the ceiling. I could see myself laying on a tile floor, curled into a fetal position. I had my finger in my mouth. Also in the room was a metal bed with a simple mattress. The white walls, I realized, were formica. A single window of real glass was set in one wall. Bars covered the window.

The door to the room opened. It had a conventional door knob, the likes of which I had not seen since the day before I ended up in the Flanaess. The man who walked in wore a white doctor's coat. He wore shiny black shoes, slacks, and had a shirt and tie on under the shirt. He came in and gestured to two men behind me. The men, dressed in white shoes and green scrubs, came in and picked me up. They treated me with care as they moved me on to the bed.

I jerked up suddenly. The three men stepped away. I struggled briefly, but my arms were restrained in a straitjacket.

"Sir, calm down." The doctor moved toward me with his hands raised. The two men next to him readied themselves to wrestle me to the ground. One of them had what looked like a nightstick. "We are here to help you. Can you tell me--"

"I will not submit!" I screamed. I stood up and struggled with the straitjacket. "I am an adventurer! I slew your lackeys at the moathouse, and I will make short work of you as well!"

"The moathouse?" The doctor's voice sounded familiar, but I couldn't place it. "I'm sure I don't--"

I jumped and side kicked one of the orderlies. He dodged out of the way easily. The other came in with his nightstick. He touched me on my thigh. A crackle went through the air. I screamed in pain. The other orderly grabbed me and restrained me easily. The doctor moved forward and stuck something into my neck.

"It's no use Doctor," one of the orderlies said. "Every time we come in here he does this."

"He's worse than when he first came here," the doctor said. "We'll keep him sedated for now."

"You will pay!" I shouted. Whatever was in the syringe started working quickly. The orderlies kept me from collapsing completely. They lay me in bed and then all of them turned to leave. The door closed behind them and I heard a deadbolt lock with finality.

"Soldiers from Verbobonc are on their way even as you torture me," I said. My words started to slur. "My friends will not leave me. Your evil will end."

I drooled on myself and passed out.

----------------------

I awoke. Hedrack pulled his hand away from my forehead. I had returned to the torture room.

"I can make you see the real world from time to time," Hedrack said. "But only briefly. If you wish to go back, you must decide to."

I shook my head. "What are you saying?"

"You see me as the man torturing you," Hedrack said. "That's because you don't want to leave."

"Of course I want to leave," I said. "I don't want to be tortured."

"You don't want to leave your fantasy world," Hedrack said. "I'm trying to help you."

"Help me," I said. "How can help me by torturing me, Hedrack."

"My name is not Hedrack," he said. "My name is Doctor Henderson. You were brought here several months ago."

"Here?"

He sighed. The look of evil I had seen in his eyes for God knows how long had gone. Now I saw a look of complete concern and sincerity. "You are in Fort Logan Mental Health Institute. The park rangers found you wandering the park without your clothes. You thought they were," he hesitated, thinking of the word. "You thought they were orcs."

I stared at him. "You lie."

"You are very ill," Hedrack said, "and you've been getting worse. Something traumatic has happened. We don't know what, but it was significant enough to cause you to withdraw into yourself."

"You lie."

"We had to do some research, but we figured out what Hommlet and Flanaess mean," Hedrack said. "You seem to have recreated this Dungeons and Dragons world in your own mind. You have disappeared into your game world to avoid...what?"

"This is a trick," I said. I found my mind clear. The pain had subsided. "You think you've broken me and now--"

"I am not trying to break you," Hedrack said. "I am trying to help you. You can't stay in this dream world forever. You have to come to terms with whatever happened to you. If I knew more about it then I could do more, but as long as you resist me I can do nothing."

"You know nothing of me," I said.

"I know your name," Hedrack said. "And that is not all." He proceeded to rattle off my home address, my social security number, where I worked, what I did for a living...and a bunch of other details. I stared at him as he rattled off the list. I wanted to strangle him, but the chains held my arms to the floor.

"How could I know these things?" he said. "How could I know so much about you unless I knew you in the real world." He gestured around him. "I'm not sure what you see here, but you are in a mental health institute. You are not and never have been to your fantasy Dungeons and Dragons world."

"I'm--I'm in an asylum?"

Hedrack grimaced slightly. "Not a word we like to use, but yes. We have been trying to help you. Unfortunately, our recent attempts to help you have been interpreted as torture. We have tried to keep you sedated for now, but I fear that you will reenter a catatonic state once more unless you pull yourself out of it."

He held up the cat-o-nine-tails again. "I don't wish to use this again."

"You and me both," I said.

"I won't sedate you again," he said, and stood. "I will leave you alone for tonight. Think on what I have said. I have tried everything, and I can do nothing more until you wish to be saved. I will help you, but you must reach out for me."

He turned and gestured at the woman. They proceeded to the door. "Good night," he said, and he spoke my real name again. Before he left he turned to face me. The temple emblem on his robe had disappeared, and the black robe had turned white, just like the lab coat of the doctor I saw. In his hand, the cat-o-nine-tails was gone. In its place was a syringe.

"I hope you will be more clear minded tomorrow." His voice sounded just like the doctor's.

The woman followed him out. She wore virtually nothing, as she always had. She started to close the door behind her and then stopped. She regarded me for a brief second, and then winked. She did not smile or change her expression as she did.

She closed the door. The dead bolt slid into place. It sounded like the dead bolt on the door in the asylum.

I looked around me. It looked like a dungeon room, complete with stone walls and torches. It stayed that way as long as I stared at it. The pain was gone. My heart raced with panic, but part of me felt relieved, as if the worst part was over.

I laid down on the floor. The chains around my wrists and ankles felt real. The stone floor felt cold. I stared at the floor, trying to change it from stone into tile with my mind. I didn't know if I wanted it to change or not.

It remained stone, even as I fell asleep.

My World of Hell, part two

It went on and on. Hedrack would ask questions and I would keep my mouth shut. He would torture me until I passed out, then cast healing spells to bring me back so they could do it again. Sometimes he brought a woman with him. She was comely and wore virtually nothing. She had a vacant look in her eyes. She seemed disgusted by my torture, but she looked incapable of reacting to it. I wondered if she had been influenced by magic.

That's when it hit me. Why didn't Hedrack just charm me or use some other suggestive magic. Maybe he could find a psion or someone to dig through my mind and collect what information was needed. That would make more sense. Then again, maybe he didn't care about the information. He might have just enjoyed doing this to someone who interfered with his plans.

After a while, the pain went away. I saw myself outside of my body. I saw someone who looked like being tortured in terrible ways, but it wasn't me. At that point, I felt free. I thought that I was dead and that he couldn't hurt me any longer.

One day Hedrack returned, holding up the journal I found in the moathouse.

"Interesting, John Carter," he said. When he spoke my name I found myself back in my own body, as if pulled there by a bungy cord. "You are a storyteller of sorts." He flipped through the pages. "Not a very good one, I'm afraid. Still, the information you provided was inticing."

Hedrack held the book in front of me as I lay on the floor, broken. "Do you know what this was? Did you think it an ordinary journal? This is a means of communication with my superiors. Lareth's went missing after you and your 'adventurer' friends sacked Outpost One. I believe the locals call the place 'the moathouse.' We wondered what became of it. Now we know."

He leaned closer to me. "What you wrote in this journal was also transcribed in an identical journal held by my superiors. They have been privy to your actions and whereabouts ever since."

I started to laugh. It made my ribs hurt, but I couldn't stop. It was the best joke I'd heard in a while.

"What?" Hedrack said. "What is so funny."

"Journal," I muttered. "I know what it is. I know."

His expression didn't change as he waited for me to continue.

"Your boss knows nothing," I said.

"Really?" Hedrack kicked me in my already broken ribs. I coughed blood. One of them probably punctured a lung. Nothing a healing potion can't fix. "You are not a convincing liar."

"He is not lying, High Priestess," a voice said from the shadows. I smiled. I had forgotten about him.

Hedrack turned away from me. "Are you sure."

"Of course, High Priestess," the man said again. "My magic is functioning properly."

"See," I said again. It was hard to speak with blood filling up in my mouth. I spit it out and spoke anyway. "Your superiors no nothing. If they did, they would try to contact you."

He stared at me like a deer in headlights. "How do you know this?"

"We got around with ease," I said. "Anyone who found us did so by accident." I started to laugh again. "Man, you guys are fricking clueless."

Hedrack's temper cooked off like TNT. He kicked me again and again. Each time it felt like my insides exploded. I kept laughing and laughing. At some point he stopped. I heard him mumble something about healing potions before I passed out once more.

-----------------------

John?

John are you awake?

I stirred. I opened my eyes. I was in my room at the Inn of the Welcome Wench, in Hommlet. Somehow, I knew it was a dream.

I turned over. Anna lay there, her clothing gone. Every inch of her was perfect. Her eyes narrowed at me as she smiled.

You're not finished already, are you?

"Hells no," I said, and I reached for her.

------------------------

"Who were you speaking to just now?"

I opened my eyes, in the real world this time.

"You were dreaming, yes?" Hedrack knelt next to me. "I must be losing my touch. I've never had anyone fall asleep on me during a session."

He pointed at my hands. Small pieces of wood had been jammed under my fingernails. I could see them clearly under each nail as they went deep into my finger. I tried to bend them, but the wood was deep enough I could not do so. Every little movement felt like a paper gut under my skin.

"I'd say your losing your mind," Hedrack said. "Sooner than I expected."

I said nothing. I didn't care.

"You have some interesting trinkets in your collection," he said. He shined my flashlight in my face. I recoiled from the bright light.

"It doesn't radiate magic," he said, "and it seems too trivial to be some kind of Suloise or Baklunish artifact."

"Not magic," I mumbled. "Technology."

He raised an eyebrow at my response.

"A tool," I said. "Common place on my world."

"Your world." Hedrack turned to face his priest. Satisfied, he turned toward mea again. "Curious. How did you get here."

"I don't know," I said. "I went to sleep and woke up in this world."

"Interesting," he said. He held up my compass. "This always points north?"

I nodded as best as I could.

"Could prove useful," he said to himself. "More on your toys later. Tell me, where did you find this?"

He held up the golden skull. It gleamed in the meager torchlight, as if taking in all available light for its own use. I could feel its vile filth, even through my own pain.

"Wizard," I said.

"Wizard?"

I nodded. "And his half orc guard."

"You must mean Falrinth," Hedrack said. He swore loudly. "What did you do with them?"

"I let them go," I said.

Hedrack turned to face is priest for confirmation. He must have given it.

"Well, they have not returned to me," Hedrack said. "That makes them traitors. Falrinth and that half-breed of his will be dealt with accordingly."

He regarded me coolly. "In the mean time, where were we?"

It began again.

My World of Hell, part one

I've avoided talking about this, but I need to share it. That would be my capture (and torture) at the hands of Hedrack.

The others wonder about it. Audry said she sensed a change in me when she first met me. She worried that a part of me had been destroyed. She has since said that she believes I have recovered. I think she wants me to discuss it, not because she is curious, but because she feels it will help. She hasn't exactly said this, but she certainly leaves that impression. She has a way of doing that--making you understand what she means without actually saying what she means. She's a bundle of wisdom.

Marc teaches me the fundamentals of magic. Haven't managed to get even basic cantrips to work. I don't even get a fizzle. I wave my hands around, say a bunch of words, and nothing happens. He says I'm making progress. I think I suck. One time I started to talk about it. He asked me a question about it, but I changed the subject. He didn't pry. I think he hopes that in time I will open up to him about it, and if I don't that's fine too. He's just giving me the opportunity to talk about it if I want.

Whenever Saul thinks I'm depressed he just gets me drunk. Then we sing (which is one way to clear the bar). He teaches me sea chanties and I teach him Beastie Boys songs. I had the whole bar shouting "No Sleep 'til Brooklyn" and playing air guitar. In the end, it makes me feel better.

Anna just winks, wiggles, and teases. She's not serious, but she knows I'm your average guy. When she thinks I'm depressed, she wears this shirt that shows off just the right amount of cleavage. Works every time. That kind of thing takes your mind off of just about anything. From time to time, she'll show me some slight of hand stuff she does. She'll even talk about locks. She carries one with her. She says it's a very simple one. I'm still working on it--hey, it's harder than it looks.

They each have their own way of making me feel better, doing what they do best. They don't push and they don't press me for information. In short, they're are the best friends I've ever had. That's why it makes me feel bad that I have to share this with a diary (and possibly my own world) instead of talking to them.

For now, though, that's how it has to be.

--------------------

I awoke. My arms felt as if they had been yanked from their sockets. I lifted my head and opened my eyes. The light was dim, but it stung my eyes. I tried to stand, but the floor was too far away. I hung from the ceiling by manacles, my feet inches from the floor. I pulled at them. The metal manacles cut deeply into my wrists. I grimaced with the pain, and I must have voiced my pain for out of the shadows of the meager torch light came a meager voice.

"Ah, good." It was a man's voice. "Awake are we?" He moved forward. He was human. His hair was graying and his face had lines, but he appeared vigorous. He wore regal, black robes. The eye-emblem was on the breast. I came to know this was the symbol of the elemental temple.

"Don't worry about your friends," he said. "They are being dealt with as we speak."

"You son of a--" A sharp pain cut me off. Something exploded on my side and chest. It felt like hot lava had been thrown at me by a professional ball player.

"Hurts, doesn't it?" the man stepped forward. "My wizard in here," he gestured toward the shadows, "is very capable. I've never been struck by them myself, but my understand is that magic missiles can be most painful." He moved within inches of me. "Is that true?"

"Oh no," I said. "It's like a maiden's kiss. Not that you would know you old coot."

Fire raked across my back, that or a thousand shards of glass. I screamed loud enough to wake the dead. The man before me did not flinch.

"My associates use far more crude instruments," he said. He reached behind me and picked up what looked like a short whip, but there were nine of them on one handle and they each had small pieces of sharp metal attached to them. I felt something warm run down my back. God, my back must be hell by now.

"But make no mistake," he said, "they are just as effective." He looked me over as he spoke, like a spider assessing its larder. "I am High Priest Hedrack."

"Oh," I said. My voice cracked as I spoke. "I've heard of you."

"Have you?" he said. He seemed genuinely interested. "Good or bad?"

"Fearful."

He laughed openly, as if we were a couple of guys shooting the breeze over a beer. "Good. Then you know what to expect."

"Well, I guess we won't be drinking to each others health."

"That depends," he said. He mumbled some words and touched me. An electric shock passed through me, but there was no pain involved. The pain in my side and my back lessened. "What I need--or rather, what my associates need--are answers to questions."

"Don't we all," I said.

He smiled, amused. "Indeed. Now, I know that the children are safe and sound and back with their families, yes?"

"Yeah," I said. "That's a pretty messed up thing to do pal."

He hesitated. "Yes. It was 'messed up,' as you say. I opposed it but my superiors said it was for the best. Dreadful business this is. So, I did as they asked and gave my soldiers strict orders not to harm them. I kept them well fed while they were here."

"You had them whipped," I said. "They had open sores on their bodies. They slept in their own filth." I spit at him. "You treated them like animals."

I felt the sharp pain from the cat-o-nine tails--for that's what it had to be--and I felt the healed wounds open up again.

"Yes, the ogre that cared for them did a poor job, I'm afraid," Hedrack said. "I had no choice, really. Most of my human guards had to watch the town. I had little choice. They refused to cooperate. If they had, their children would have remained with them, unharmed."

"You expected them to surrender to you just like that?"

"Oh come now," Hedrack said. "They're peasants. Peasants. Does it really matter who rules them? They work and toil their life away, regardless of their leaders. Nothing would have changed if they were ruled by us or Verbobonc."

"Us?"

"Of course," he said. "You know who my superiors are."

"Not precisely," I said. "I suppose whoever your boss is happens to control that army south of here as well."

"Yes," he said. His eye brows rose. "Very good. You have caused us much trouble, you and your friends. You shall be punished accordingly but if you wish to survive you will answer my questions." He gestured behind him. "One of my priests shall use magic to determine your truthfulness." He gestured over his other shoulder. "My wizard will provide appropriate punishment, as will my colleagues behind you."

I knew they were there when I felt the pain of the whip. Only now did I really sense their presence.

"Now," High Priest Hedrack said, "tell me what Verbobonc knows of our plans."

"Plans?"

All at once I felt the impact of magic missiles once more. They hit me in the exact same spot. At the same time, that evil whip peeled more skin off my back.

"Don't be coy," Hedrack said. "If you want to live and if you want your friends to live, you will do as I say."

I realized it didn't matter what I said. Verbobonc was open about a few things, and we had learned a few things while digging through the temple. I could share the information with him, but he wouldn't let me live. After everything we'd done? The best I could hope for was a quick death.

I felt blood run down my back. I couldn't take many more of those. And with Hedrack and his healing spells he could keep it up for a long time.

And what about my friends? Were they alive? Would he be done with them once I forked over everything I knew.

I was seriously screwed. I had to hold out. I couldn't lie to them, not if the priest was using some kind of lie detector thingy (and I every reason to believe this was the case). I had to keep my mouth shut for as long as I could.

Hedrack sensed this. He nodded, dismayed. "As you wish." He nodded to the people behind me.

Hours later, my blood coated the floor. I would pass out from the pain, only to awaken a few minutes later with my wounds healed. And then it would begin again. It went on this way for hours before they finally left me. They released the chains and left me on the floor, not fully healed, but enough so that I would last a while longer.

The pain was so great I couldn't even think. I could only sit there and whimper. There's nothing dignified about it and there's no heroic way to endure it. You simply lay there, broken, and hope they don't come back.

But they always come back. And it gets worse.

Knights on the road

"John," Saul asked me one day. "What does 'milf' mean?"

We weren't two minutes outside of Mitrik when Saul smacks me with that one. I nearly fell out of my saddle.

"Yeah," Anna said. "What does that mean?"

I cleared my throat. "When did I say that?"

"The night before last," Audry said. Her tone was not approving. "When you were drunk."

"Oh," I said. "Is that when I commented on--?"

"Yeah," Anna said. "Well, before that."

"Who'd I call a milf?"

"Our allustrious Dame Gold," Marc said. "I believe the phrase was, 'oh man, she's a serious milf.'"

"Then you asked me if I agreed," Saul said.

"What'd you say?" I asked.

Saul shrugged. "I'm not sure. My head was swimming in ale by that point."

"You said you didn't know," Audry said, "but you thought she had the most lovely...." She trailed off and snorted. "There is a reason you should not indulge in that swill."

"Tell that to Prince Thrommel," Anna said. Audry immediately went red.

"Ah, yes," Saul said. "I saw the two of you talking yesterday in the courtyard. What--"

"That," Audry said, holding up her index finger at Saul as if he were a spoiled child, "is no one's business."

"Sounds serious," I said. I tried not to smile under Audry's glare.

"It is," Anna said. "In Greyhawk there was this prince from Nyrond who--"

"That will be quite enough," Audry said. "I think we've gone on long enough about my private affairs."

"Affairs?" Marc said. "Oh, I see."

Audry turned a different shade of red. "A poor choice of words on my part. And I'm not sure how but we seem to have gone on to a tangent that has little to do with the original topic."

"Oh yeah," Anna said. "What does milf mean anyway?"

Thanks, Audry.

Well, that took some explaining. With two ladies present, I didn't want to describe the actual definition. Granted, Anna would probably laugh herself silly at the real meaning, but Audry had already gone red in the face a few times today. I eventually simplified it to a word to describe an older woman who is highly attractive. Which is true, I suppose.

Well, at any rate, it did allieviate our worries. You see, dinner with Thrommel last night we discussed a message he received from Dame Gold. Dame Gold is...well, Dame is Dame. She is rich and has political power, but she was not born into the noblity. She is a person of great influence in the town of Safeton along the Wild Coast and people listen to her. She is 40ish and has the body of a super model. She is regal, but according to stories she was a prostitute in the streets of Greyhawk. They say she was even a member of the Thieves' Guild there.

Basically, Dame Gold is everything you wish your girlfriend's mom was.

Dame is also very protective of her subjects. Raids from the Pomarj (a nation of humanoids to the south of the Wild Coast) have always been a problem, but they have managed to fend them off. Recently, however, the raids have become invasions. Armies of humanoids are marching into the Wild Coast, not as raiders but as soldiers.

Raiders and bandits acting like soldiers. Sound familiar?

As our first duties as knights of Veluna (yeah, all of us were knighted, not just me), we are to go see Dame Gold and render any assistance necessary.

"With respect sir," Saul asked during dinner, "why us?"

Thrommel proceeded to read a letter...addressed to us.

To the Saviors of Hommlet,

May it never be said that the courageous undertake valor for the hope of reward nor the righteous seek purity, and thus may aspersions of evil never fall upon thy name. But, as ye know too well, the rewards of virtue are painful and cold.

Our advisors, through wisdom and sagacity, have proclaimed thy actions good and virtuous, done for the wealth of the people of Hommlet. Those so noble as yourselves will grace and ornament the presence of any gathering. We beseech you to kindly honor us with your presence during the Feasts of Edoira at Windy Crag in the town of Safeton.

Dame Gold.

"Saviors of Hommlet," Marc said. "She makes us sound important."

"You are important," Thrommel said. "You have earned tremendous respect in the central kingdoms."

"I suppose that's nice," Anna said, "since we didn't earn any gold or anything."

"Anna," Audry said. "The gold belonged to the people in that region. It wasn't right for us to keep it."

"It was nice of them to let us keep some of these magical trinkets," Saul said.

"'Trinket' would not be the word I would use to describe John's sword," Marc said.

Did I mention my new magic sword talks? And it has a little bit of an attitude too. More on that later.

"Sir," I said, "there is nothing in the letter regarding her need for help."

"Certainly not," Thrommel said. "She sent her personal advisor with the message for help. She seems to think there is a spy amongst her staff and does not trust to send a written message."

"This is how we are to help her, then?" Audry asked.

Thrommel nodded, and I thought I saw him wink at her. "You are to keep your purpose of being there secret to all," Thrommel went on, "except of course for Dame Gold herself. Dame will provide you with further instructions."

Thrommel cleared his throat. "Lady Gold is an old friend. Help her as best as you can."

"We would do no less," Audry said.

Thrommel bid us to leave the next day (i.e. this morning). Dinner continued with small talk. That night, we went to our rooms. The next morning, Anna came to me with a big smile on her face.

"Audry did not return to our room last night," she said.

"Really?" It didn't take much effor to determine where she was. "But, she's a Paladin."

"So is he," Anna said. "And of the same faith, no less."

"Oh," I said. "Well, good for her."

"Maybe," Anna said. "Knowing Audry, they probably stayed up talking all night." She sighed. "She would pass up such an opportunity."

"Opportunity?"

"For love making," Anna said. Her shoulders sank low. "I cannot describe how desperate I am at this point."

I was a bit speechless at this point. What exactly do you say to a woman when she says that? If I say, "me too," it would make it appear as if I were offering and she would get mad. If I say, "well, I hope your dry spell ends soon," that sounds like I'm accusing her of being a tramp.

Women.

Fortunately, Marc joined us. "Everyone ready?"

We were, and we left in the early morning. Audry was the last to join us. She was joined by Thrommel. As they entered the stables, I noticed they were holding hands. They released them as soon as they were within sight of us.

Ah well. It's not like I had a chance with a paladin anyway.

"Good luck, my friends," Thrommel said. And we were off.

We traveled all day without incident. We are planning on going to Hommlet first to check on things, and then head on through to Safeton. It's been a while since we've seen Dame Gold. I've heard about this Feasts of Edoira thing from Saul.

"Lots of girls," he said.

Anna snorted. "Is that all you think of?"

"There was a time when you didn't complain," Saul said.

"Yeah, well I came to my senses."

They teased each other often about their previous relationship. It happened long before we all met. They talk often, but I think it is truly over between them.

Part of me thought, that means she's available. I felt like a high school student again. Well, even if she were available, it probably isn't a good idea. It would disrupt our relationship within the group, and we have a job to do.

Did I mention? We're knights!

End with a bang

I spoke briefly with Prince Thrommel in the hall today. We were going to have lunch together, but lunch has turned into dinner. My guess is he has a job for the newest Knights of Veluna (that's me too you know--I'm a frickin' knight!) and he wants to go over it with us. He won't give me details just yet.

You know, he looks a lot like, well, Prince. I mean the Prince. Little Red Corvette, Kiss...you know. Imagine Prince with large muscles and you got the image. He even sounds a little like him, just with a little more of that command presence you see in leaders. I keep expecting him to do that little screech that Prince is famous for.

Great, now I'm going to have Purple Rain going through my head all day. Yeah, I'm a knight and an adventurer, but I'm still a freak.

The rest of the story:

-----------------

The chair rose to the top in less than a minute. My ears popped when we reached the top level. Around us were the familiar scenes of depravity (depravity--that's Flanaess speak for pr0n and Doom-like violence, only really disgusting). And that wasn't the end of it.

Bodies littered the hall. Mostly it was the bodies of humanoids--trolls, ogres, orcs, and others--but along with them were the bodies of humans bearing the symbol of the elemental temple. And amongst them were a few others bearing another symbol.

"Is that what I think it is?" I asked.

"Yes," Audry said. "It looks like Prince Thrommel has returned.

In the distance we heard fighting. We dashed off the throne and across the multi-colored tile to the front of the temple. We dodged bodies, most of which were in fact bad guys. Bodies littered the floor from back to front. One of the side doors to the temple had been torn from its hinges. The massive, golden doors covered in runes stood stoically, still eminating raw fear. After everything we had been through, it had little affect on us.

We poured outside the temple and were greeted with a battle. Humanoids and some humans, all wearing the symbol of the elemental temple, fought humans, elves, and even dwarves. The last bunch wore the symbol of Veluna. In the front, fighting like a tiger on steroids, was Prince Thrommel himself.

We didn't bother to announce ourselves. I drew my sword and charged for the group of humans who directed the humanoids. They stared at me in complete horror. One of them started shouting orders to the humanoids, many of whom turned to face me. I cut them down without a thought, my sword whistling through the air. I danced and turned, using techniques that I thought I was incapable of. The magic sword I found in the air node added to my skills, and I became a one-man blender. Behind me Saul and Audry fought more humanoids. Anna pelted bad guys with arrows like the little Legolas she is. Marc launched artillery magic into the body of the humanoids.

It was complete chaos. We had rushed up on their flank. The had Thrommel and his troops on one side and us on the other. They had only two choices--fight or die. They chose the former, but they'd get the latter anyway.

God knows how long we fought. I carved up ogres and trolls. When a troll fell one of Thrommel's wizards would set afire by magic, and I'd move on to the next. The human servants of the temple fought valiantly, some of them were even pretty good. In the end, nearly all of them died. There were maybe a couple of dozen humanoids who fled, many of whom were pounded by arrows and spells as they ran. Three humans surrendered, all of whom were low ranking warriors. To their credit, the temple priests fought to the death. Even so, I doubt Zuggtmoy or Iuz would grant them any leniency.

When the last humans surrendered, a cheer went up. The elemental temple had been defeated. I wanted to cheer, I really did, but I knew it wasn't over yet.

"Good to see you my friend," Thrommel said. He extended his hand. We shook vigorously.

"Just in time," Saul said.

"Indeed," Audry said. She moved close to Thrommel. For a moment, I thought she would embrace him. She checked herself at the last second. "It is good to see you."

He raised an eyebrow and smiled at her. "And I you, Lady." He faced us all. "I am sorry we could not arrive sooner. We fought our way here from Verbobonc. The roads are full of bandits." He shook his head. "Bandits that fight to the death."

"More soldiers from the temple perhaps," Marc said. "Or from elsewhere."

"Like the Pomarj?" Anna asked.

"The Pomarj?" Thrommel asked. "Why there?"

"Someone important," I said. "Look, my Prince..." I hesitated, I never knew what to call royalty. "Uh, we have a larger problem."

I held up the skull. Some of Thrommel's men gasped. They carried what looked like holy symbols. No doubt they could feel the evil as did Audry.

"Yeah," I said. "You should try it from my end."

"The Orb of Golden Death." A man stepped forward. He wore a long robe. "The legend is true."

"Not for long," I said. "We need all wizards front and pronto, and we need a granite maul, and--"

"A moment," Thrommel said. "What do you plan here."

"We're going to destroy this," I said, holding up the Globe. "And with it the elemental temple."

-----------------

We had everything in place. The dwarves managed to fashion a granite maul. It wasn't pretty, but it was strong and it would do the job. At least I hope.

I had the wizards lined up, along with a dwarven priest weilding the maul. "All right guys, here's the deal. We gotta hit this thing in the right order and quickly. If we screw up, we have to start over. Got it?"

"Aye," the dwarf said. "Ye tell us what to do and we know. Now let us do it boy!"

"I like your attitude," I said. I set the skull on the ground. For a split second, a train of thoughts went through my head. Powers were being revealed to me, powers normally only reserved for gods. The power to influence armies. The power to cast spells the greatest mage could never hope to do. With the skull, I could unite all kingdoms under one banner. I could guide them to a better tomorrow. I could teach them technology. Plumbing, better irrigation...even penicillin.

The power to make any woman love me.

An image of Anna filled my mind. If you wish her, the skull said, she can be yours.

A harem of women at might disposal. All would love me forever.

"Tempting," I said, and released the skull. It pleaded with me, begged me. It didn't want to go back. Where "back" was I had no idea, but I didn't care. One legend of the skull I remembered from my old gaming days--in the long term, no good can come from it.

"Let's get it done," I said.

Marc got the ball rolling. He cast his spell quickly. A gust of wind blew over the orb. Nothing happened.

The dwarven priest stepped forward as soon as it was done. He heaved with great might and smashed the orb with the maul hammer. It made a resounding thunk. Pieces of granite chipped away with the impact, but the skull remained unphased. He stepped back quickly, looking at me. "Ye are sure, yes?"

"Yes," I said. "Keep going."

One of Thrommel's wizards stepped forward. He cast his spell. A fireball erupted across the skull. The flames disappeared quickly. Again, the skull was unharmed.

"Go!" I shouted.

Three men ran forward, carrying a large bucket of water. In the dead of winter, the water was ice cold, almost freezing. The ran forth and poured it across the skull. The affect was almost instantaneous.

A high pitched shriek filled the air. I covered my ears as I backed away with everyone else. The shriek only lasted a few seconds. When it ended, the skull shattered. Bits and pieces of it flew in all directions. Some of them pelted off of me. I looked down at a large piece that might have been part of a golden tooth. It lay on the ground briefly before disappearing into the cold earth.

"Is that it?" Anna asked.

The ground rumbled. Behind us, the temple of elemental evil shook at its foundations. Debris shot into the air as the main complex sank into the earth, as if the ground under had given way. Just as I remembered from the old game, the nodes and the lowest level had collapsed. And the upper levels fell in after it. Anything inside the temple was doomed.

The collapse lasted maybe ten seconds. Dust lingered in the air, but even so the air and land felt clean. The taint of evil had been destroyed. The gnarled trees and shrub around us would grow again. In time, the land would become clean.

Elven priests moved through the air, casting spells and blessings. "Wood elves," Anna said. "They'll make sure everything returns to normal."

"I hope so," I said. The clouds parted and the sun appeared. Just like in the movies. "By the way, thank you."

"For?"

"The wake up call. Very, uh, innovative."

"Innovative?" She laughed. "I don't think I've ever been described like that before."

Anna winked at me and went to join the celebration that had already begun. My mind felt clear, clearer than it had in a long time. It wasn't just the destruction of the golden skull that poisoned my mind. It was everything. I had done some good in the world. Real good. I had made everyone for miles safer. I fought evil and evil lost.

Yeah baby! Yeah!

I looked down at my sword. It gleamed in the sunlight. Nothing nicked its blade and the blood had run off of it.

"Couldn't have done it without you," I told it.

I started to sheath it, but stopped. I nearly soiled my pants at what happened next.

"No," the sword responded. "You certainly couldn't."

Movin' on up

Ah. Much better.

A lack of medical technology really sucks. Fortunately, we have clerics and healing potions. It practically makes up for the lack of medical technology. A broken bone can be healed completely in moments. A person recently dead can be brought back.

And best of all, hangovers are cured like that.

I feel like I could go drinking again.

Anna came up after the priest was finished with me (and finished with his speech about indulging in excesses). She sat on the edge of my bed as I sat at the only chair in the room. She just smiled at me.

"Long night, huh?"

"Yeah," I said.

She kept looking at me, kicking her legs playfully as she rocked back and forth. "Just so you know, you missed."

"Missed?"

"My boots," she said, "when you were sick."

"Oh," I said. I thought for a moment. "You know, I passed out at some point."

"Yes, you did." She smiled. "So you don't remember what you said to me?"

Women. They're the same on Earth and in the Flanaess. They're the same whether human or elf. They play games and love to watch us squirm.

Okay, time to apply a little logic. If it were innocuous, she wouldn't bother. If it were insulting, she wouldn't be talking to me in the first place. So it must be something...else.

"Uh, what'd I say?"

"You don't remember?"

"Well, if I did, then I wouldn't need to ask."

She kept smiling. "Well, it was...well...."

"That bad, huh?"

"No, it wasn't bad, I just...."

I waited for her to finish, but she let the sentence hang. "Want to know if I meant what I said?"

She nodded. "Did you?"

"Well, that depends."

She stopped rocking and put her feet on the floor. "Depends?"

"What I said." I leaned forward. "What did I say?"

"Well," she said, and then paused for drama, "if you must know," pause, "it had something to do with how we got away from Zuggtmoy."

Oh boy. "Oh, I see. Well..." I cleared my throat. "It was probably the alcohol talking--"

"Okay, if you say so." She stood quickly. "Well, just so you know, Thrommel wanted to have an audience with us at lunch tomorrow. But we were all going to the tavern later today, so come along, okay?"

"Yeah, sure," I said. I stood as she opened the door to leave. "Anna, I--"

"No, no," she said, holding up her hand. "No worries." She opened the door and stepped outside. "Remember, if you can, to meet us for lunch." She shut the door.

I've fought a dragon and stood up to a power demon. I've fought men and monster alike. I've been in deep, dark dungeons. As an adventurer, I should be a whiz with the ladies, right? You know, like Conan or Darkstalker. But I'm not. I couldn't tell if she was upset or amused. And you know what? That kinda scares me.

We had lunch, and we ended up telling stories to soldiers while we were at the tavern. You see, when there's no TVs, radios, mp3s, internet, and other forms of entertainment we are used to on Earth, people entertain themselves by telling tales of exploits. That and actually going on some exploits.

We got back a little while ago. I never had a chance to talk with Anna about what happened. It's one of those things I'm supposed to know but I don't. So I have to figure it out but I can't ask.

I wish we were fighting monsters. It's so much simpler.

And the incident? Well....

-------------------------------

Take me my love, the skull said.

The skull knew. It belonged to her, and probably Iuz as well. And it wanted to be with her. I knew the power the skull had, and like most magical artifacts it probably had powers I could never hope to understand. In the hands of a demoness like Zuggy....

And I was going to give it to her, no questions asked.

I could feel Zuggtmoy's presence, but I couldn't see her. The world was no longer real to me. In the distance I heard Anna calling my name. I focused on it, trying to allow it to pull me into full consciousness. I heard her swear, and then I felt her. Oh God, did I feel her.

She planted her lips on mine. She pressed against me so hard my lips pinched against my teeth. She shoved her tongue all the way into my mouth and played with mine. One hand pressed against the back of my head as she pushed herself into me. The other hand....

I felt a jolt go through my body. Everything snapped back into reality. Anna's lips were warm, as was her hand. She must have kissed me only a second, but it felt like minutes. She pulled her tongue from my mouth and stared at me, her eyes frantic.

"Do something!"

I glanced up. Zuggtmoy's hands were inches from the globe. I put an arm around Anna and took several steps back. Zuggtmoy cried out, furious. She made to chase us, but something stopped her. It was as if there were a plate of glass kept her from leaving the stairs and entering the large room where we were.

Mistress!

I focused my thoughts on the skull. It hated me for pulling away from Zuggy, but its power was still mine. I called upon that power.

The air over Zuggtmoy's head rumbled. She looked up just in time. Fire rained down on her head from the ceiling. She waved her pseudo pods at the flame, trying to block it. She backed away down the stairs, trying to avoid the gout of fire. It followed her, determined to pour as much damage on her as possible.

Bastard! the skull screamed in my mind. Its anger thrilled me. The little rotten thing was going to help us escape. Then we would destroy it. And I knew how to do it.

"To the throne!" I shouted.

"The throne?" Saul said. "What throne?"

"The one that's going to be right there in a few seconds."

The pillar of rock lowered steadily, just as I ordered it to. The skull couldn't help but share the information with me. It couldn't help but obey me.

Anna and I ran together. I still had my arm around her. Audry and Marc were just behind us, with Saul bringing up the rear. Behind us, Zuggtmoy cried out in pain and anger. From the looks of it, she couldn't follow us, but her powers could still affect us.

By the time we reached the area the throne appeared from out of the ceiling. It lowered quickly and settled into the floor. The purple colored basalt throne looked completely perfect.

"Now, how did that happen?" Audry said.

"The skull, John?" Marc asked.

I nodded. "Quick, stand on the throne." I pointed upward. "We have to go through that hole."

My little flamestrike had long since ended. Zuggtmoy, her anger stoked, moved forward. Her bulbous form moved to the top of the stairs. Her eyes boiled with a brilliant, purplish light.

I called upon the skull again. Angered, it obeyed. The air at the stairs crackled like broken glass, and then the wall appeared from nowhere. Zuggtmoy jerked back as her view was blocked by a wall of solid ice. It didn't phase her. Already, her hand started glowing with a brilliant light as her hands enveloped in magical fire. The ice wouldn't be there for long.

"Hold on," I said. All of us linked arms. The skull in one hand, I called upon its power for the last time. The throne rose slowly into the earth above.

As we entered the earth I heard the ice wall shatter. Zuggtmoy's scream of rage could be heard for a few seconds, and then was quickly muffled when the throne entered the rock tube. We continued to rise steadily.

"How far does it go?" Anna asked.

"Ah, of course," Marc said. "The throne in the upper room."

"Yep," I said. "My friends, we are leaving the elemental temple."

"Well, normally I'd celebrate," Saul said. "But I think I'll wait until we are in the open air."

"We have done much good," Audry said. "We freed the children stolen from Hommlet, we stopped the source of the raids...but what of Byrne and Rufus."

I felt a sense of shame. I had completely forgotten.

"Zuggtmoy said something about the Pomarj," Marc said. "Maybe that should be our next stop?"

"Yeah, sure," I said. "But first, I say we destroy this temple."

"A noble sentiment," Audry said. "One that I fear is beyond our abilities."

"Not at all," I said. I stared at the golden skull. I could feel its fear. Its time was at an end, and it new it. "I know exactly how to do it.

The rest of the story

One thing I never liked about traveling in this world: It takes so fricking long to get anywhere.

We arrived in Mitrik at last. I can't even begin to tell you what this city is like. And I thought Verbobonc was impressive.

As we entered the city, it was a scene straight out of Lord of the Rings. Thrommel looked like Aragorn, riding into the city on a white horse as people threw flowers in his path. Where all the flowers came from I can only guess. People cheered loudly. Most seemed poor by my standards. They wore torn clothes and pants that had not been washed in months. Their shoes seemed okay, but many had holes in them. The stench of unwashed humans filled the city, a smell I remember vividly from Verbobonc. I commented on all of this to Anna who rode beside me. She nodded grimly.

"You should see those in actual poverty," she said.

Apparently, many of the ones I saw were considered lower middle class. She then went on about how here people were clothed and taken care of. Elven standards seemed more like American standards. You bathed every day, unless you didn't care about socializing with others. If your clothes had holes you got new ones (unless holes in your clothes were part of the local style).

On the plus side, most of the people looked healthy. I saw no one with any obvious open sores or disease. Everyone stood up right and seemed to be relatively healthy. Even those who looked a bit thin did not look as if they would fall over from starvation. Clerical magic did wonders to stop the worst of human suffering.

Overall, the people and the city looked better off than Verbobonc or Hommlet.

After about half an hour of riding, we made it to the palace. I'd seen pictures of castles before, but nothing like this. The architecture was astounding. Sections of the palace were supported by a handful of pillars, while other sections hung out over ledges precariously. It seemed as if parts of it were ready to fall at any minute, but they remained steady as the ground beneath it. And all of it was geared to perfection. Earth architects would have been hard pressed to create such a thing.

Marc noticed my astonishment. "Dwarven architecture is a thing to behold."

I nodded absently. I wish these guys were building cities back on Earth.

The guards stepped behind us, blocking the crowd from entering. The crowd did not press against the guards, and the guards did not make any attempt to push them back. It seemed there was an understanding between them, as if the had known each other for a long time. I didn't know if that relationship was good or bad, but based on their reaction to Prince Thrommel I'd have to say it was mostly good.

I felt someone tug at my sleeve. I turned away from the crowd on the other side of the palace gates. Audry was on her knees, gesturing at me frantically. I looked around. I was the only one standing. I dropped to my knees quickly, looking around to see what the fuss was about. The palace ahead of us had only one door, a very big one that was now open when it was closed only moments before. Three dozen men in plate armor stepped forward. Plate armor is bulky, but they moved with uncanny grace. They lined up in positions that were both defensive and ceremonial. Behind them, appeared the emperor of Veluna.

He was elderly, perhaps sixty or so, but he moved with confidence. He dressed in fine but practical attire. He wore no crown.

The emperor walked straight toward his son. Thrommel stood, and they embraced. Tears formed in the emperor's eyes as he looked at his son. Soon after he shook all of our hands. The guy had a grip like a vice and his hands were calloused. Probably from years of using a sword.

What followed were a bunch of ceremonies. They went on and on. Marc and Audry knew exactly what to do. Saul did for the most part, but he had to be politely reminded by the chamberlain. Anna and I were lost. A forest girl and a middle class city boy among royalty--we were Connecticut Yankees in King Arthur's Court. We both kept asking, "What do I do now?" The Chamberlain (and others, who kept calling me "sir" or "My Lord") politely told me. After a while I just wanted tear my hair out. Look, I wanted to say, I'm glad we found your son and all, but couldn't we just get something to eat and hit the hay? It's been a long ride.

That's when the shocker came.

The emperor drew a sword as we knelt before him. My first instinct was to reach for my own sword, which of course was not present. I steadied myself. He wasn't just going to cut me here in front of everyone. Of course, he was the emperor. He could do whatever his imperial heart wanted.

He pointed the blade at me. I just looked at him, which no one had told me not to do. He then tapped each of my shoulders with the blade. Without a word, he did the same to Anna next to me, and then Saul, Marc, and Audry.

I wanted to dance a jig on the throne. I had just been knighted!

That night, the party went on and on. Oh, man was it long. There was music and fireworks (mages make great fireworks). There were girls and food. There were girls and ale. There were also many drunken men singing.

It's a ratatatatt on the nucleus of your brain cell
came to rock the funky joint so I might as well
get on the one
and have some fun
and drop a break in the barrel of my shotgun
boom like a bolt of lightning goes my shotgun
I pass the mic to cause I like to
Back on a mission and ready to ride
if we don't get you now gonna get you on the b-side

coming at you live monophonic lo-fi
were cutting up rugs where the beats will never die
in it to win it no matter how skin it
no holdin back loading breaks to the finish
boom like a bolt of lightning goes my shotgun
I pass the mic to cause I like to
Back on a mission and ready to ride
if we don't get you now gonna get you on the b-side

"But, what does it mean?" Thrommel asked.

Well, that took some explaining.

Oh yeah...and there were girls. One of them actually tried talking to me. I wanted to ask her out, but I was hammered. I opened my mouth and I don't remember anything else after that. God, I hope I didn't puke on her shoes.

Now my head hurts. Saul woke me up a little bit ago and said the cleric was making his rounds. I didn't know there was an anti-hangover spell, but apparently so. I wonder what Saint Cuthbert thinks of that. I think he's taking his sweet time on purpose. So, until he gets here I figure I better pick up where I left off.

--------------------

The curtain of light rose up and then collapsed again. We were no longer on the node of water. The air was drier and easier to breath. I inhaled deeply. No smell of salt or humidity. Nothing but air. I could have cried.

We stood in a pitch black room. I heard Marc dig through his pack and pull out his lantern. He unhooded it. The continual light spell spread through the massive room. The room itself was completely plain. Rectangular, stone walls surrounded us, including a stone ceiling above. After weeks and weeks of open sky, I felt claustrophobia creep in. I shoved it aside.

The only distinguishing feature was the floor. We stood on the triangle rune. The other three runes were nearby.

"We made it," Anna whispered.

Told you, the golden skull said in my mind.

Hell. I thought I forgot about that thing.

"Let's figure out where we are," Saul said. "Then see if we can get out."

I remembered part of this place. There were only two ways here: through the runes (how we got here) and through the circular door. There was no way out of the nodes except via the runes (and that only brought us here), so that meant we had to break down a door. Not a pleasant prospect. Those doors kept her Majesty, Queen of Pond Scum, Zuggtmoy, from going topside and wreaking havoc.

You see, I do remember that much from the old pen and paper game. She is here on this level. In the game, we saw her and ran. We managed to open one of the doors, but I don't remember how.

"Looks like there's only one exit," Saul said. "Anna?"

She nodded, a big grin on her face. I couldn't blame her too much. The poor little forest girl was stuck on the ocean for god only knows how long. Her shoes went squish as she walked. All of us were still wet. My hands still looked like prunes.

The hall leading out of the rune room didn't go very far. After twenty feet or so it opened up into a large room. Mold and lichen covered the walls and ceiling. Their stench was ungodly, and the further into the room we went the worse it got. I imagine this would have been heaven for the goddess of molds and slimes (man, there's a portfolio). To my left were a large set of golden doors covered with arcane runes--the very door that lead to the surface. Ahead was a large set of stairs leading down--down was definitely bad. To my right--

A sense of understand overwhelmed me. I caught my breath with the shock of it.

Audry put a hand on my shoulder. "John?"

I tried to speak, but the words would not come. I knew what was before me. It looked like a large column of carved rock protruding into the ceiling. That wasn't the good part. The good part was what was on top of that column of rock.

There it is, fool, the skull said. Our freedom is eminent. We do not need these fools. How much help have they been? Have they found the way out?

I wanted to tell the skull to shut up, but the words would not come. I wanted to order the pillar of rock to descend. The skull could do it. It gave me the power to control the throne that rested on top of that pillar. It gave me the power to raise and lower it, and to get us the nine hells out of here.

But my mouth would not work.

"Something's wrong," Audry said.

"You don't say," Marc said.

I felt her presence. I felt it through the skull. It was her that kept me from speaking. She manipulated me through the skull. Against my will, my body jerked around like a puppet and faced the stairs. My legs jerked forward, pulling me toward the stairs. My body wobbled back and forth, throwing me off balance, but I didn't fall. I stopped at the top of the stairs.

The others followed me. "John, what's going on?" Audry said. I couldn't answer. I continued moving like a puppet toward the stairs.

Standing a few steps from the bottom was...well, H.P. Lovecraft himself would have gone insane.

"Gods," Anna whispered. Her arm wrapped around mine and she pulled. I remained rooted to the spot. Audry started to pray, her teeth chattering as she did. Saul drew his weapon and I heard Marc mumble something that might have been preparations for a spell.

Mistress, the skull whispered in my head.

Zuggtmoy stared at us, her large green face was featureless and unreadable. Her dark eyes blinked and I got the distinct impression she was amused. She stood on legs with no feet. She shambled from out of the shadows. Every inch of her green skin on her ten foot high frame was covered in blisters and zits the size of my fist. Her skin rippled as she moved, and as it did a few of the blisters burst. Milky white puss spewed across the floor. It reeked of rotten eggs.

"At last," she said. Her voice was feminine, but distorted as if she were speaking under water. Or through muck. "At last, you have returned to me."

It has been so long.

"Indeed," she responded to the voice in my head. "Now, come to me."

One of her pseudo pods reached for me. Hands formed on the ends of them. Those hands that reached for the skull, the Orb of Golden Death that rested in my outstretched hand. I was going to give it to her. I couldn't help it.

"Get a hold of yourself, man," Saul said. "Marc, can you help."

"I can--" he stared, but didn't finish. The air rushed out of his lungs as a force pushed him away. I heard him land hard on the floor. Audry rushed toward him. Saul rushed the other way, his sword drawn. I would have told him how foolish it was if my mouth worked. This time I felt the blast of air that picked up Saul and tossed him aside. It would have knocked me aside as well if I hadn't been rooted in place.

She laughed. Milky white pus bubbled from her toothless mouth. "John Carter, I presume." Her tone carried a demeanor alien to her appearance. "My lovely Iuz spoke of you, the one who killed Hedrack."

I managed a faint smile.

"It matters little," she said. "He thought he could deceive me, use me to help his friends in the Pomarj. I was willing to acquiesce so long as plans to free me continued." She hovered over me, looking me over like I was a steak. "I wonder how long he had the skull and said nothing to me."

She glanced at Anna standing next to me. I could feel Anna tremble as she tugged at me. My feet felt like roots that dug deep into the earth.

"I wonder how long my beloved Iuz would keep the truth from me?" she said. "He is beautiful, and I love him, but he lies to me when he thinks I will not notice." Her lipless mouth smiled. "But I know more than he does."

She gazed at the Orb of Golden Death. My hand was outstretched, but my fingers clutched it tightly. She took her time, toying with me. Whatever compulsion she had me under, she knew I would do what she wished.

"Ah, but I reveal myself through the villain's exposition." She reached for the skull once more. There was nothing to stop her. "And now--"

There was a rush of air from behind me, followed by tremendous heat. A jet of flame passed over my head and engulfed Zuggtmoy's head. She lurched backward, swiping at pseudo pod at the fountain of flame. In seconds the spell ended, but the flames continued to lick at her face. She stumbled as she backed down the stairs.

"John, we gotta move now!" Anna kept tugging at me. "What the hells is wrong with you?"

"He is compelled," Marc said. He came up behind me. "It's her doing. I don't know if I can undo it."

"Then we carry him," Saul said. He reached down to pick me up. He struggled for a few seconds, but I was most definitely rooted to the spot. Ahead of me Zuggtmoy had put out her flaming head. From what I could tell, there was almost no damage.

"He's being held magically," Audry said. "Marc, can you--"

"A moment." Marc mumbled an incantation. Zuggtmoy began ambling her way up the stairs again. Whatever he planned, he wouldn't have time. They all had to know that, but they wouldn't leave me. I wanted to tell them to leave me, to save themselves, but even if I could I knew they wouldn't listen. There are certain things that are acceptable back home that are not here. Here, honor is very real and is not a misguided concept. Here, you never leave your friends in a bind. Ever.

My friends would die living up to that honor.

------------------------------

Ah, the cleric is here. I'll finish up this later.